Paranoia is the name of this pregnancy. Just when I think I've settled in and started feeling super-optimistic, something happens that knocks me down a bit. I'm still reading that pregnancy message board, and one of the women there lost her baby this week. She was just about 14 weeks, well past the time when most people think they're safe. She knew she wasn't safe (she'd said that many times), but she had started to feel a little more confident. Kinda like me.
I'm proud of myself, though - usually when I'm feeling insecure, I run for the doppler. This morning, I've not used it. Yet. That's a big deal. As much as I'm trying not to overuse my doppler, it's addictive.
I'm working on a couple of posts about things I've seen in the news lately - uterus transplants and custom embryos.. fascinating stories that are getting a lot of press lately. I'm thrilled to death with the concept of a uterus transplant. It wouldn't help me any, but women with uterine abnormalities have very limited options right now, so I think this is a big step in the right direction. And any pioneering work in treating infertility is a good thing.
I'm a little more torn on the embryo concept. And having a hard time finding an unbiased link to put here since apparently this is one of those topics that people feel strongly about. Go figure. In case you haven't seen an article, here's the link ---> NPR : Adoption Agency Offers Up Embryos to Couples, and I'll work on putting my thoughts together on the subject soon. It's time-consuming because, in general, flirting with a semi-negative opinion on things which do not apply to you (and probably never will) is asshat behavior. However often I write about things which have abso-freaking-lutely nothing to do with my life, it's still asshat behavior and must be treated delicately... because, you know, it's very easy to disparage something when you're safe in the knowledge that (for you at least) it's all theoretical. Much harder to hold the same opinion when you're staring at a decision affecting your own reality.