I wrote a post yesterday. Really did. It's sitting in my 'saved drafts' pile despite the fact that it's totally finished. I'm way too superstitious for my own good. Worried that I'll publish it and the Cosmic Gods of Reproduction will pat themselves on the back and chuckle well, we sure fooled her this time - good job, boys!
Yeah, I'm that optimistic. I wish I were a poas addict*. I wish I'd ordered those 'net tests like I've been promising myself for a long, long time so I'd have a whole pile of them and not worry about wasting one or three. I wish it were wednesday or thursday or friday so I'd know how this cycle turned out. I'm 12.5dpo today. If FF is right, then I'm 12dpo... but there's that whole pesky collapsing follicle on my ultrasound that would make me 13dpo. I'm splitting the difference and calling it 12.5. Too early for me to go out and buy a test. No. Matter. What.
Most of all, I wish I didn't know so much about reproduction that I'm doing complicated math in my head. if the average hcg is 100 at 14dpo, with a doubling time of 48hrs, 12dpo would be 50, which is so totally detectable with the right test.. and 13dpo... oh yeah, it could be accurate.
Yeah, that's complicated for me.
And disturbing. Where are these thoughts coming from?
I'm going to think on that while I go re-brush my teeth to see if I still gag on my toothpaste.
Yeah, Hope woke up with a vengeance this morning... while Reality countered with it's just leftover nausea from spending the whole day surrounded by paint fumes yesterday... and the estrogen, let's not forget the estrogen.. it's not what you think.
small update: I did NOT gag on my toothpaste this afternoon, except when my toothbrush got too far back in my mouth... considering I have an overactive gag reflex, I'm attributing this morning brushing gag-fest to a sleep-induced lack of coordination. I guess I brushed too close to the gag reflex this morn. dammit.
*really, I'm not. I'm such a non-addict in that sense that I don't even keep hpt's in the house.
3 comments:
I'm not sure if I have HPTs or not. But then again, I have my monitor test sticks which can, in a pinch, be used as an HPT.
I tested very faintly positive with P at 13dpo and had a beta of 87 two days later. EPTs are really sensitive.
You're a stronger woman than I at 12.5dpo.
Hope to hear good news from you tomorrow.
It's amazing we aren't all crazy. Good luck when you finally take your test. Fingers crossed.
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