Thursday, August 17, 2006

Take your belly out of my sight and leave me alone.

B is always trying to make friends for me. I love the guy, but I'm happy with one or two people I can do things with. I don't need a whole lot and quite frankly, I don't have a lot of energy to maintain friendships with most of the high-maintenance women I know.

Still, he persists.

Several months ago, he introduced me to the wife of one of his friends. She was a little abrasive for my tastes, and she was an over-sharer. Within 10 minutes of meeting her, I knew that she was worried about her husband's fertility. She had one child when they met who was an 'oops' baby, and they had tried for 8 whole months before her youngest was conceived (that's not the oversharing part - since most people know our problems, they're comfortable talking about IF, but wait for it... aquaintance TMI coming up). Once she got pregnant, she felt better about her hubby's swimmers... until the paternity test showed it wasn't his baby. Yup, I learned that within the first few minutes we met. I have zero tolerance for marital infidelity. Apparently they were separated at the time, but the fact that she wasn't sure which man's baby it was tells me they weren't too separated.

So that was strike one.

They were TTC at the time, it had been a few months and she was (again) worried about his swimmers. Shortly after that, I discovered I was pregnant and she got kind of distant and snotty. I wasn't exactly missing her, so I didn't mind that part. When I lost that baby, she was ok with me again. Strike three.* Right around my miscarriage, she found out she was pregnant. I tried very hard to be happy about that. Really, I did. My issues are my issues, and shouldn't diminish someone else's happiness. But when she called to ask me if I thought it would be ok for her to go on rollercoasters at an amusement park because she was "only two months", I drew the line. When we were at said amusement park and she was complaining how not-fun it was to be pregnant and unable to do anything fun on the one-month anniversary of my miscarriage, I walked away. I didn't say a word to her after that... until we saw her last week and I had no choice.

She is by now obviously pregnant. And. She. Wanted. To. Hug. Me.

run away.. run away now...

But I survived, I resisted the impulse to scream or cry (or ask her if she was actually having her husband's baby for a change) and made polite small talk for a minute.**

After we left, B looked at me and said "I could have lived without seeing that beyotch again".

See why I love this guy?

*I have a high tolerance for infertiles who distance themselves from pregnancy. It's a coping mechanism, I get it... but if you've only been trying three months, and already have two children less than two years apart you do NOT count as infertile and lose the right to give me attitude about a pregnancy I fought two years to achieve. thankyouverymuch

oh, and strike two was when she corrected my child in front of B for something that i didn't think was wrong - she thought it was inappropriate for him to be in a diaper with no pants in front of her three-year-old daughter on a day when she'd dropped by with no warning and he'd just woken up. Overstepping? yeah.

**ordinarily, i wouldn't have bothered, but... her husband's a really nice guy, and he's still friends with B. for his sake, i'll be polite.


ms. c said...

Ok, this woman is a total biotch in my books. Insensitive, rude, unsympathetic, sleeping with two men? Give me a break. She has no clue about anything, and she has no right to take up one more milisecond of your time. Please stay away from her, you deserve better than that.

Heather said...

OMG. What a complete heifer. I can't imagine what she is thinking?

You are a MUCH nicer woman than I am. You deserve cookies, lots and lots of cookies - with chocolate and ice cream.

DD said...

Yeah, you are much nicer. I would've told her that no only are roller-coasters safe, but highly recommended as well as smoking, drinking and shooting crack cocaine.

...but that's just me and my way of being passive agressive.

Kris said...

Beyotch is right! And you are a far better woman than I for being so polite in the face of her beyotchiness.

'B' said...

WOW! You are a big person.. not in size, but tolerance. I would have to restrain really hard to not slap this chic. Did all sense of respect for other humans leave her va-joo-joo with her marital standards? See? Me? Not so nice. I am so sorry you have to deal with the likes of this person. You're great for doing it for B.